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Thank God for the Fermi Paradox!

By Alan Crowe (Wed Oct 15, 2008 at 11:46:45 AM EST) (all tags)

Why are aliens coming to Earth? They haven't arrived yet so we cannot ask them, but we can guess. Poll inside.

< Has the house been bugged? | Kick it. >

Poll

Why are aliens coming to Earth?

-	Humans are tasty and full of meaty goodness	27%
-	Their previous race of sex slaves died out under the pressure of alien sadism	45%
-	The pretty green planet will make a wonderful holiday resort after all those yucky placental mammals have been eliminated	9%
-	To purge the galaxy of the stench of organic life	0%
-	The human liver is a valuable xenograft that cures elderly Blarg of their equivalent of arthritis	9%
-	Big game hunting is way more fun if the game ain't dumb	9%
-	To find exotic, educational pets for their children	36%
-	To make a reality TV show about how a bunch of apes cope when a superior species slows down the apes moon to the point that the orbit starts to decay	18%
-	To make converts to their religion who will then become foot soldiers in their crusade	0%
-	Their medical researchers pretend that dumb animals can offer useful experimental models of their equivalents of depression and schizophrenia, but their licensing authorities are cracking down on this nonsense	0%
-	The rituals that appease their Gods need sentient victims. They come to spare their children	9%
-	The hosts that they parasitize only live for 30 years after sexual maturity forcing them to "move home" twice as often as they would like	27%
-	Building an intergalactic starship requires a lot more iron than you can get from the crust of a planet	0%
-	Water worlds are hard to find, but earth has more ocean than land and the seas are deeper than the mountains are high so a bit of bulldozing and Bob's your auntie	36%
-	Schadenfreude	54%

Votes: 11
Results	\|	Other Polls

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Thank God for the Fermi Paradox! | 8 comments (8 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback

Q: What do you consider . . . by slozo (4.00 / 1) #1 Wed Oct 15, 2008 at 02:03:39 PM EST

. . . to be an alien?

So... by ana (2.00 / 0) #2 Wed Oct 15, 2008 at 03:07:15 PM EST

How ya gonna build a starship? It's gonna take a hell of a lot of fuel, so one nice way is the Bussard Ramjet concept. You gather up interstellar hydrogen, and use it in your (yet to be invented) fusion reactor.

However, for the nearest 100 parsecs or so surrounding the solar system, there's a significant underdensity of interstellar gas. So if They are coming and using a Bussard Ramjet, they'll find we live on an island in the middle of a lake. They can't get here.

Cool, eh?

"And this ... is a piece of Synergy." --Kellnerin

: You obviously have little experience with aliens. by nightflameblue (2.00 / 0) #3 Wed Oct 15, 2008 at 03:31:52 PM EST

The idea that they can only run ships on fuel types we are aware of is pretty comical to them. Yessir, ol' Zorlacher and me were just tittering about that the other day.

[ Parent ]
: Getting in would be just fine by ShadowNode (4.00 / 1) #8 Thu Oct 16, 2008 at 02:52:02 AM EST

Acceleration would be hard, but they'd likely be going pretty fast by the time they reached the low density bubble anyway.

Stopping would be hard, as would getting back out once you did.

[ Parent ]

To rescue our financial system by herbert (2.00 / 0) #4 Wed Oct 15, 2008 at 03:39:12 PM EST

with banking technologies far in advance of our own.

Like Monopoly money? by nightflameblue (2.00 / 0) #5 Wed Oct 15, 2008 at 04:33:28 PM EST

n/t

[ Parent ]

Economics 2.0 by Vulch (2.00 / 0) #6 Wed Oct 15, 2008 at 06:29:14 PM EST

Charlie Stross has warned us about that.

[ Parent ]

: Personally, Im cool with it. by LinDze (4.00 / 1) #7 Wed Oct 15, 2008 at 07:15:11 PM EST

I'm just going to do whatever my cat tells me to.

-Lin Dze
Arbeit Macht Frei
[ Parent ]

Thank God for the Fermi Paradox! | 8 comments (8 topical, 0 hidden) | Trackback


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